June/July 2014 - More surgery and progress :)...

      FIRSTLY just a 'warning' I am including photo's of some of my scars in this post so if you wouldn't like to see don't scroll down!

 



        On the 17th July I had the second stage of my scalp revision surgeries. The first of which I had in October which I wrote about here, the second stage involved the same as the first. Remove as much of the scar as possible and pull both sides together to create a smaller scar, and in the case of scalp scarring like mine reduce the area of baldness. The operation went well, it's painful and you have a sort of half face lift while the skin stretches but to have less of a bald patch is fantastic. I underwent some more steroid injections to my shoulder scar while I was under the anesthetic as well which will hopefully flatten the large lump on it but I didn't see much change after the injections I had on Christmas eve.

Not the best photo as my hairs covering some of it, but this is after 1st stage before 2nd stage (the scar constantly scabbed) 

After on the day of the operation

     The reason I chose to include photo's and have done in some past post's is because on many occasions I've found myself googling things about surgeries, injuries. treatments and experiences I've had or got. Either to try and find information or see that I'm not the only one, one of the main aims of this blog is the possibility it could help someone else. I'm also happy to answer any questions about any of my injuries and treatments just ask :)

    I'm still having driving lessons and if/when I pass my test I will be able to make steps towards starting work... It feels strange even typing that! I am extremely lucky in that I was going to begin a great opportunity at the time of the crash, although it was awful timing (not that there's a good time to have a life changing trauma!) they are so supportive that it has been held for me and they are very flexible with my abilities and the limited hours I will be able to work so I can start long before I would be able to in most jobs. I struggle with pain and still use two sticks to get around but when I've passed my driving test I will be able to drive to work and therefore save all my physical energy for the few hours I will be there, safe to say I'm very excited! :)

On that note I actually have to go for a driving lesson now!

DRIVE SAFE, George xxx

Major catchup!...

I always sit down to update this blog and then end up not writing anything so now I have loads of things to write about! 
I'm going to try and keep each thing short and sweet and rambling to a minimum..

On the 5th December (was that really almost 4 months ago?!) I jetted off to Budapest with Joss and two close friends for another 21st birthday celebration, I mean if you can't go clubbing you have to have two trips right? It was a fantastic few days but I did struggle with the wheelchair a little and had some low times thinking about how different my 21st should of been. Although the hostel was pretty wheelchair friendly and I managed to get to the bathroom there with my crutches or sticks. All in all it was great to get away with some of my biggest supports and best friends.

The trusty chair in it's 3rd country!

 

On the 23rd December I moved back up to my old upstairs bedroom after 16 months sleeping in the bedroom my parents had to make for me in our front room, in order for me to come home from hospital. I started off in that room barely able to transfer from my wheelchair into my bed with a board and with a commode in there, but it was still hard moving back upstairs. After I first went back into my room I decided to have it painted a different colour to make it easier but it still didn't feel like 'my room'. I think it's because I feel so different from the 'old' me now and I probably subconsciously thought everything would be back to normal when I went back. I'm slowly accepting I won't be exactly the same ever again, no part of my life will be the same but that doesn't have to be a bad thing. 

On Christmas eve I had an appointment with my burns and plastics consultant to review my scalp surgery (read about that here), at the review it was decided that I will have the surgery repeated to improve the size further and hopefully that will help with the pain and pulling of the hair around it. I also had some painful steroid injections into part of my shoulder scars that are hypertrophic in the hope it will break down some of the tissue and help with the pain. Most of my scars are hypertrophic..

''A hypertrophic scar is a cutaneous condition characterized by deposits of excessive amounts of collagen which gives rise to a raised scar, but not to the degree observed with keloids.^[1] Like keloids, they form most often at the sites of pimples, body piercings, cuts and burns. They often contain nerves and blood vessels. They generally develop after thermal or traumatic injury that involves the deep layers of the dermis and express high levels of TGF-β.
When a normal wound heals, the body produces new collagen fibers at a rate which balances the breakdown of old collagen. Hypertrophic scars are red and thick and may be itchy or painful. They do not extend beyond the boundary of the original wound, but may continue to thicken for up to six months. They usually improve over the one or two years, but may cause distress due to their appearance or the intensity of the itching; they can also restrict movement if they are located close to a joint.
Some people have an inherited tendency to this type of scarring'' wikipedia

The 3rd January was both the one year anniversary of me standing up and my first driving lesson since before the crash. I may need to have an automatic but I am determined to learn and pass in a manual if possible because I feel it is an advantage to be able to drive a manual if needs be. Having a car would be so helpful to me as I can't walk anywhere but could get out more independently if I could drive to my destination. It's definitely very emotionally hard being in a car and I am filled with panic but I'm focusing in how much it would aid my recovery.

The 8th January was my five year anniversary with Joss! I intend to do a full post at some point about everything he has done for me but we'll save that for a really soppy day! 

For the 16th and 17th January I was in London with mom to see a ballet as her 50th birthday present from me! I used my wheelchair for 90% of the trip but was able to use sticks to get on and off escalators without which we wouldn't have been able to use the tube at all. My barely 5ft tall mom had to carry my wheelchair while I clung on to the escalators and you would be shocked at how few people offered to help! Just being able to do that though is massive progress for me. The ballet was called La Corsaire and was a sort of pirate love story, I enjoyed it a lot more than I expected to be honest and the skill of the dancers is just amazing.

 

Last but certainly not least Joss had an operation on his shoulder! His first operation date was cancelled pretty much just before the anesthetist came to see him! And he ended up having it three weeks later on the 17th February (his 22nd birthday). He dislocated his collar bone in the crash which was treated with a sling and left but as it was causing him pain again 18 months on they basically pushed it back down and secured it into place with an artificial ligament. It was very painful and he wasn't allowed to drive for 5 weeks which was hard on both of us as I can't walk anywhere we were pretty stuck, but he's doing really well now and is back driving phew!

 

Now I hope this post wasn't too boring as I was trying to cram in too many things but I really am going to try and update this more often as i find it really helpful even just to myself. 

Thank you to everyone that ever reads this blog and to all the people who give me feedback on it. It gives me a place to express myself, see my progress and hopefully help any other people in the mean time. I absolutely love hearing from people and would love some comments if anyone has any :)

DRIVE SAFE, George xxx

''How are you?'' - Physical Update...

   Whenever I see people or bump into someone on one of my rare outings they usually ask how I am, nice right? Well yes it is nice but it's not that easy to answer. Chances are I'll just say 'fine' or 'OK thanks' or if I really am in a very bad mood maybe even 'crap' but then usually followed by 'but I'll be fine' people don't want to here things aren't going well they want you to say you're doing great and then they feel better and get on with their day and if its a quick stop and chat in the street they certainly don't need me rambling on about my recovery. I thought this would be a better place to try and explain 'how I am' with a quick (maybe not that quick) physical update.

14 MONTHS ON...

Bones - My last Xrays show that my Pelvis is knitting together well as is my spine and looking at my first Xrays compared to that one is a massive change. The first ones frankly are a mess there are a mass of breaks and the pubic rami (inner pelvic ring) is totally snapped and distorted. I still get a lot of pain in my pelvis but I'm told I always will and there is a chance I'll need a hip replacement when I'm old enough because I broke my right hip socket.
My Femur (thigh) is finally going in the right direction but 14 months on it still hasn't fully grown back. Basically when I arrived on that fateful day a large portion of my thigh bone had literally been ground to nothing so I was left with a bit of bone coming down from my hip socket and a bit coming up from my knee with a big gap in the middle (cringe I know) so I endured a massive operation whilst still in a coma and had a plate and screws put in which will stay in forever and is the length of my whole thigh.
My wrist, shoulder and jaw are doing well I still get a few niggles here and there but they healed well.

Organs - My lungs and liver have healed very well and fingers crossed they wont cause me too many problems in the future.

Face - My Septoplasty operation has made some difference however it has not totally fixed my septum so I still can't breathe fully through the left side of my nose and it may well collapse back. The person who stitched my left nostril back on deserves a medal because the scar is so neat. My bottom lip reattached itself to my gums now I have a scar running across my bottom gums which can be a nuisance when eating certain foods.

Burns/Scars - Obviously my worst scar is the exhaust burn on my back which I endured skin grafts on but I also have scars from the severe road/friction burns to my hip, shoulder and scalp, the plate in my thigh, the stitching on my nose and the lung drain holes on my sides. Most of them are hypertrophic which means the scar becomes over granulated and raised. They itch a lot and hurt in the cold. The scar on my scalp which caused me to have half of my head shaved is being operated on tomorrow...I'm very scared about that. The full thickness burn to my back is by far the biggest scar it pulls the skin around it in and is very tight around my waist. It itches and is very sore if pressure is applied. I still have to massage all of my scars with different creams multiple times a day and still have a compression garment. I don't know how I will deal with my scars when I wear the clothes I like and they are on show..

Walking - I often get asked how far I can walk and how long until I can use a walking stick etc. Basically I am now starting to use crutches around the house and have used them to get into a restaurant once. It's really hard to explain because I don't know how long it will take. I still use the wheelchair to go out to placed and I'm going away for my 21st in December and have been told I will need to take my wheelchair. At some point I will use crutches out and a tripod walking stick and a normal walking stick at home then those out and one stick at home then one stick for everything. But all of that seems far away. I have physio every week which I enjoy but if I push myself I get pain in my back, hips, leg and knee so it's tough.

If you find any of this remotely interesting and want to know anything else feel free to ask :)

DRIVESAFE, George xxx

JAN '13 - New years eve, STANDING UP!!!!, Loose women and a Wig...

  So I thought I would write about New Years Eve in January not December (living life on the edge!).  New Year was always going to be difficult, as a 20 year old woman generally you want to dress up, dance and essentially get very very drunk. I couldn't do that this year. Very kindly Joss's family offered to have a party at there house so that I could celebrate with my friends at least and it was good and hopefully everyone had a great time. It's just that nothing is simple anymore, in order to go to their house and stay over night I had to bring my ramps to get through the front door and the commode chair to put over their downstairs toilet (thank God they have a downstairs toilet!), which involved taking the ramps from the front door and using them from the step in the kitchen into the utility area. Once in there Joss had to move the ramps to wheel me out of the sink room and down the 'corridor' to the toilet room and help me onto the commode chair and then wheel that over the toilet and vise versa to get back to the kitchen. This meant no-one else could use the downstairs toilet and every time I went everyone had to move out of the kitchen drawing loads of attention to it. I also tried to dress a bit nicer which resulted in me breaking down. I lost a LOT of weight in hospital but after coming out I started to gain it back, however I can't do any exercise at all so I could eat half of what I ate before the crash and still gain weight. I've also lost a massive amount of muscle in my legs meaning they aren't the same shape at all as before. And let's not even delve too deep into the fact I only have half my hair left. Let's just say I felt absolutely hideous and I have never had this little confidence in my whole life. I got to spend the night with Joss though for the first time in nearly 5 months as they had set up the front room with a bed which was worth it.

   On the 3rd January I had another trauma/orthopedic/bone review. I had the usual long wait and xrays and then another long wait before seeing a doctor for a talk through the xrays. You could still see all the black lines in my pelvis where the breaks are/were but it was FINALLY knitting back together. My left thigh is held together with a big metal plate and screws (A 9 hour operation I had while still in a coma). They had to remove a large section of bone so there is a big gap between the two ends of bone but after 5 months it was showing signs of growth. And so almost 5 months on I was told I was allowed to start weight-bearing in physiotherapy. I think I was in shock really, at first I was told 12 weeks no weight-bearing and I'd been to 3 reviews hoping for good news and leaving with nothing since coming out of hospital. And yet I wasn't even that happy...I don't know why I think it was just fear really. I didn't know what this meant would I be able to just get up and walk?
Luckily the same day I had psychotherapy and physiotherapy appointments as well. (Another full day spent at the QE) In psychotherapy I was told I probably have Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, I'll talk more about that in another post I think.
And in Physiotherapy I STOOD UP. I was scared. I was excited. I was sad. It was unbelievably hard and it hurt. But I did it, put my feet on the floor and was upright for the first time since I stood next to Joss's bike and climbed on behind him for the short trip home that ended in complete horror. My mom cried, Joss cried and had to leave the room, but here it is ....   http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RDmhIcdtjow   



On the 9th January I went to watch Loose Women Live... Yes I know very random! In December I checked my email for things from the solicitors and other less fun things and found one telling me I had two tickets to be in the audience of Loose Women. I had completely forgotten applying for tickets I think I did it while in hospital! So on the 9th January me and my mom got up very early for the long journey to London! Now as usual this was so hassle free trip it involved driving to Birmingham, waiting in an office for someone to escort us to the train to put out ramps, once in London we had to wait for the person to remember I was stuck on the train and come with the ramps to get us off. We couldn't get the tube because our stops didn't have wheelchair access, so we wandered around trying to find the right bus, regularly finding ourselves staring at steps and having to go a long way round! Eventually we made it to the studios and were allowed to skip the waiting outside thanks to the wheelchair (Its got to have some perks!). All of the seats were up steps so I had to 'park' by the camera men and women which was pretty cool. It was good it's weird seeing famous people or people 'from the telly' in real life. Sadly we didn't have any time to look around London as we had to make the long journey back but it was most certainly a good day out!

Disabled ramps for the train

     I think I've mentioned enough times in this blog that I had to have half of my long hair shaved off in this accident. Firstly the plait had to be cut off as it was trapped in the car, and then most of the rest of the right side of my scalp was shaved off due to my head injury. I've spent the last months wearing hats, head scarves and stuff to cover the area or disguise the fact that I have the most ridiculous hair I have ever seen now. Yes I could cut it all off but why should I? None of this was my fault, I've spent a long time growing my hair and really really struggle with the fact half of it has been taken away as well as so many other things because of HER actions. So my occupational therapy team asked her insurance to pay for me to have a wig. I might not wear it much and no I'm not completely bald but it gives me the option on days where I really can't cope with it to pretend I still at least have normal hair. What do you think?...

DRIVE SAFE, George xxx